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Is there any way to challenge a recommendation of a welfare officer appointed by the family court against allowing the judge to meet children, aged 12 and 16, and hearing from them directly why they refuse to meet their mother ?

Yes! A special application can be filed to the court requesting that the judge meet the children in person. The application needs to be reasoned, and detailed. The welfare officer's recommendation is not binding on the court.

Israel is a signatory to the International Convention on the Rights of the Child, and, as such, is committed to letting children have their say in proceedings concerning them.